As parents, we always want to encourage our kids to be better. Stereotypically, most parents give praise when a big accomplishment occurs like a good test score or the completion of a great game. However, in order to truly benefit our children, it is also important to tell your daughter that you are proud of her even for small achievements and acknowledge positive actions.
Individuals with high self-esteem tend to be more driven, have improved mental health, and handle difficult situations in a more constructive many. By taking the time to tell your daughter that you are proud of her, you can help her feel more confident and have a better chance of success in her personal and professional life.
For some parents, like myself, it can be difficult to explain to your children exactly how you feel. You might feel proud of her but have been unable to tell her up to this point. As difficult as it may be, it is our job to express our feelings to our children, especially positive ones. If you are having trouble telling your daughter you are proud of her, there may be a larger issue with your relationship with your daughter
What you may not know is that there is a multitude of ways to express this, without always uttering the same phrase. Here are some of the top ways to say and show her this sentiment.
9 Ways to Tell Your Daughter You are Proud of Her
Here are 9 specific ways to tell your daughter that you are proud of who she turned out to be.
1. Remember Why You Should Be Proud
Two of the main reasons why you should acknowledge your pride in someone are their hard work and their positive actions. Praise should never just be about the destination. It should also be about the journey. We all have struggles and recognizing when someone overcomes those moments can make all the difference in how they handle future situations.
Furthermore, if your daughter holds the door for someone else, takes time to pick up trash at the park, or shows kindness towards others, take the time to note these gestures. Saying phrases like “I love how compassionate you are” or “Your kind heart is why people love you so much” can let her know that she is cherished for being herself and it reinforces this type of positive behavior.
2. Express You’re Proud in Different Ways
There is nothing wrong with saying “I am proud of you” every once and a while. However, it is important that this phrase maintains its meaning. By repeating it over and over again, in the exact same way, it loses its effect. Therefore, interchange it with expressions like these:
- “I am so impressed!”
- “I admire you for your hard work.”
- “Thank you for being you.”
- “I know how hard this must have been and you did it!”
- “I am so excited for you!”
- “You were incredible!”
- “I am so lucky to have such a talented daughter!”
- “I am so glad that all that practice paid off!”
- “Great job today!”
- “That’s my girl!”
- “You are improving every day!”
Remember that it is important to not just acknowledge them, but also the work, effort, and practice that they dedicated to this venture. Hard work pays off, but without the proper motivation, it will not always happen.
3. Express Your Emotions
Take the time to say “I love you”. It is a simple phrase that carries so much weight with a child. It makes them feel secure, builds trust between the two of you, gives them a sense of value and it lets them know that you are there, even if they make a mistake. Moreover, uttering those three little words can bring them joy and confidence!
4. Tell Others About Their Accomplishments
There is no better way to tell your daughter “I am proud of you” more than bragging about someone’s actions and achievements to others! This action validates that your sentiments. While she may protest and claim that you are embarrassing her, you are also subtly building her self-esteem!
Moreover, showcase her projects and accolades in your home for visitors to see. Subtly use it as a conversation piece to further let your child know your feelings.
5. Note When Things Don’t Work Out
We cannot win everything all the time and things won’t always go our way, no matter how hard we try. Recognize the obstacles that your daughter overcame and address her failures in a positive light. Let her know that you are there for her and that you are impressed with her efforts.
Furthermore, reinforce that failure is how we learn, grow and improve. Call to attention that she has taken the steps to get better and that is amazing! Likewise, Michael Jordan, Thomas Edison, and Walt Disney are just a few spectacular people who also failed before they rose to success!
Tell her that you are always in her corner and that you are aware of her efforts and sacrifice. This lets her know that you are proud, without actually saying it.
6. Show You Are Proud With Rewards
On rare occasions, surprise your daughter with a gift. Let her know that she is appreciated and that her hard work does not go unnoticed. This is a simple and yet meaningful way to show that you value her efforts and applaud her endeavors. Remember though, this should never become a habit because you want her to be self-motivated.
7. Pick Your Moments and Phrasing Wisely
You never want to be too overzealous with your praise. This will make it lose its luster. Take the time to admire important moments and little gestures. Also remember that negative comments should never be intertwined with the compliment, as it lessens the effect.
Therefore, instead of saying “I am sorry you lost your game, but you did a great job”, say “I was so impressed with your defense, and you got three goals this game! All of your hard work is paying off!”. This focuses the attention on her achievements, which leads to increased confidence and the drive to do better next time.
8. Show Affection
It may seem like another minuscule gesture, but the act of giving your child a long hug reduces anxiety and stress, increases comfort levels, and is actually proven to make participants feel happier. In fact, studies show that when a hug lasts twenty seconds or longer, the body produces oxytocin. This hormone is known to modulate social behaviors like empathy, trust, and communication.
Other forms of affection can be a kiss, a high five, or doing a happy dance when they do something worth celebrating! When combining your actions with words, you double down on the impact of your sentiment.
Listen to these families show affection, pride, and love towards one another.
9. Focus On Her
Body language is key in any type of communication. By facing the person that you are addressing and maintaining eye contact, you subliminally tell them that you are being genuine and that you care about them. Additionally, for younger kids, make sure to get down on their level. This will make much more of an impact than if you are talking down to them.
Final Thoughts – Telling Your Daughter You’re Proud
Meaningful and repetitive reinforcement is an extremely beneficial exchange that you can have with your child. Telling your daughter you are proud of her helps to solidify positive actions and behaviors that will better your child for the entirety of her life!
When showing and telling your daughter that you are proud of her, remember that this is not a competition. Never compare one child to the other. Always keep the attention on the person you are praising and their specific actions.
However, you also never want your daughter to become arrogant. Therefore, teach her the importance of celebrating other people’s wins and thanking those individuals who helped her along the way. Humility and kindness should always be a two-way street. Be the example your daughter strives to become!