Is being 19 too old to live with your parents? This is a question that comes up a lot in many discussions.
Once you become an adult, there is a lot of pressure to become independent, move out, and to start taking care of yourself. Many 19-year-olds feel that they should take the step and move out because they are old enough but there are many factors to consider before doing this move. Whether or not you need to move out or stay at home is dependent on a variety of factors unrelated to your age.
Reasons To Stay At Home
There are some great reasons why a 19 year old should stay at home. It can lead to many benefits that will help you transition smoothly into that adult life.
You Need To Save Money
Many young adults have a difficult time-saving money or making smart financial decisions because of how low their incomes are or because of how expensive the cost of living is. If you have the opportunity to stay at home to save money, it will benefit you in the long run. Your parents may even encourage you to stay home for that reason so you can have a head start and have a good financial future.
Some of the things you should consider saving money for include a car or other transportation, moving expenses, first and last month’s rent, a security deposit, and up to three months’ worth of emergency savings.
Another important thing you should start thinking about is how to invest your money. Sadly, the school system does not teach any financial literacy to the students going through the education system and it leaves millions of high school graduates confused on how to make smart financial moves.
This is why you need to start learning how you should invest your money at an early age so you can achieve financial freedom.
You Are Going To College
Going to college is mentally taxing and time-consuming. It can be difficult to work and go to school at the same time. Some parents encourage their young adult children to stay at home so that they can put in the proper time and effort into their studies. If you are going to college, consider asking your parents if you can stay at home until you are finished with school.
You may find that it’s easier to study if you don’t have roommates who want to stay up late and party. You may also find that it’s easier to focus on your studies and future career if you aren’t constantly stressed about how to support yourself.
You are also more likely to have a better support system at home when you are stressed about your studies and exams.
You Need Additional Support
If you need additional support from your parents because you have a mental or physical disability, it might be prudent to stay at home so that you can get the support you need. Perhaps your parents take you to the doctor, therapist or provide you with the medical insurance that you need to take care of your health condition.
You can continue to rely on their support from home and know that you will be taken care of. It can be difficult to become independent in these situations and it is important to take the step of moving out on your own when you are truly ready.
You Aren’t Mentally and Physically Prepared To Move
Moving out is a big step and not every 19-year-old is ready to make the jump to independent living. Your parents may still provide you with healthy nutritious meals, financial assistance, or emotional support. If you need more time to be mentally prepared to move, you may want to take it slow.
Additionally, moving out is very expensive. Being ready to shoulder the burden of caring for yourself financially is the most crucial step toward moving out on your own. If your job cannot reasonably pay for your cost of living, you may need to stay at home until you can find a different job or until you can save money for moving out.
Reasons To Move Out
There are also many reasons why someone should consider moving out. Like it is mentioned above, it does not depend on the age but rather some factors that the 19 year old is facing.
Your Home Environment Is Toxic
If you live at home and the environment is often stressful, then it might be a good idea to move out. In particular, if you feel like your house is constantly in a state of flux, your parents often yell at you or there is violence in your home, then you need to find a safe place to live.
A toxic environment will not allow you to thrive and can create more difficulty for you if you stay. For example, it may be difficult to focus on your studies or get to work on time if you are being berated or threatened by someone at home. You could consider moving into a place with a friend or having roommates if you aren’t financially ready to be fully independent.
Your Parents Have Asked You To Move
Whatever the reason might be, your parents may ask you to move out. They might be part of the group that thinks someone who is 19 is considered too old to live with their parents.
If they ask you to move, you may have to find somewhere to live before you think you are ready. However, staying may not be an option as it might create long-term family conflict. Family conflicts can persist and create stress in your everyday life and just like living in a toxic environment, it will be difficult to get things done including studying or working if you are in conflict with your parents.
Consider why your parents are asking you to move and see if there is a compromise that you can come to. Perhaps your parents are worried that they won’t be able to afford your continued presence in the house, you might be able to alleviate their fears by offering to pay for some or all of your expenses. However, if this doesn’t work, you may have to move out.
Your House Is Too Small To Accommodate You Living There
If your house is very small and especially if you share a room with a sibling, you may want to consider moving out so that you can have your own space. Sharing a space with a sibling can be frustrating at times and once you are an adult, it becomes incredibly difficult to experience the freedom of adulthood when a younger sibling is around.
You may find it difficult to study or get to work on time especially if your sibling sleeps at different times than you. You may find that there is a constant fight over the bathroom and that can make getting to work on time difficult.
When you have had enough, it may be best to move out. Staying with friends or roommates will be a better option because they are also most likely going to school or work a job.
You Are Mentally And Physically Prepared To Move
If you have spent time-saving up to move and you are emotionally prepared to move, it may be time to start looking for your own place.
If you live in a safe and loving home, you can take your time looking for the right place or living situation. This will give you time to consider whether or not you want roommates, the area you’d like to live in, and what type of housing you can afford. You may also have the support of your family and friends, which will help boost your confidence in moving out on your own.
It Matures You
When people say that a 19-year-old is too old to live with their parents, there might be some truth to it. People never become fully mature until they move out of the place they grew up because being fully mature requires you to handle all responsivity over yourself without having the support of your parents.
The children that prolong their stay at their parents’ house never feel the sense of maturity as their peers who have taken that step. Once you are able to provide for yourself, you will feel a feeling of full maturity and a sense of accomplishment.
If you do decide to continue living at home, there are a few considerations you need to make.
- Can you realistically follow the house rules and curfews your parents set?
- Have you discussed your future plans with your parents?
- Have you made a plan for how you’ll know you are ready to move?
Consider creating a plan for how you’ll know you are ready to move and present it to your parents. Discuss your future with them and ask for their support.
You need to also make sure that you can follow the house rules and be respectful of your parents’ boundaries even though you are considered an adult.
Moving out is a big decision and shouldn’t be made lightly. A 19-year-old isn’t considered too old to live in their parents’ house if both you and your parents agree that it’s the right decision for you.
Many young adults stay at home until they finish college or get married. What works for one young adult does not necessarily work for another so you’ll have to consider what makes your situation unique and plan accordingly.